Sunday, May 27, 2007

Life's Testimony

I am in a midst of daydreaming to the point where my face shows a tinge of nostalgia.

I have been walking down the memory lane lately.

Reflecting on my life.

Talking with God.

Have I been been bumming around? I really don't know.

Believe it or not, I went through a quarter of my life with resentment and rebellion. I was a tough cookie when I got to the age of 10. I was really mean to my brother and I find that I was just hating life and finding the world so unfair. Maybe that was teen angst arriving early. My mom and dad were just at the tip of the cliff. Looking back, I am really so so sorry. I was ungrateful. I was angry at everyone. I know it may not seem much because of my youth but these are your tender ages where your maturity develops.

It will be hard to change yourself when you are older. It's till the point where you just shut off.

-But-

If with patience, compassion and prayer; you can change a person. I really believe so.

By the time I reached secondary school, I am exposed to more than curricular discipline and homework like in Puai Chai. It was a horror just enduring standard 5 and 6. Even though it was UPSR I was struggling to keep my head above the water.

I am really different than who I was then. I learnt not to hate things. Sports, music and all aspects of life are tests.

Family Camp is coming up next. Yeah...

Friday, May 18, 2007

Difference in Sentiments

这条路到我又单独地航行。我求求你不要离开这个生活给我慢慢地寻找我生活里的目的。你是我的朋友为何要伤我们两人之间的关系? 虽然我们被距离分散,我以为海洋或灾难不会瓦解着美丽的友情。你答我好吗? 你假装我的不存在是你骗你心所说的。我很想念你。

It's the post exam period now. I'm in a relaxed mode. Maybe not but there's something off my back and it's rewarding.

Relaxed. Yeah... haha. My cousin sister.

I've been thinking about a lot of stuff lately. Just an idea.

Do you think you made a difference in your life?
Or either the difference is just so trivial and small like making those people you call 'friends'?
Are they just flirts or whims of fancy?
They are not jewelery to decorate your room of life.
There's a lot of change in this school. Compare it when we're Form 1 or Form 2. There's big change. For the better?
I saw this old woman across the street. She was old. Age was prominent in her eyes. This young boy not a day older than 8 took her hand and walked her down the road. He talked to her. He made a stranger's day brighter. That was compassion.
Compassion makes a difference.
Not something that is for your personal gain.
Make a meaningful relationship while you can. You all make these jokes yeah they're fun but if it's all jokes then you're a clown living a joke of a year.
I know it's hard to be selfless but that's what compassion is all about.
We try. Try our best.

Friday, May 11, 2007

Candor & Verity Are My Camaradarie of Conduct

Bold's for the truth.
Italic's for what you wished were true.
The fakes were left alone

I miss somebody right now.

I dont watch TV these days. sad...isn't it... I don't gave astro and it's the exams.
I wear glasses or contact lenses. yeah... four eyes.
I love to play video games.
I’ve tried marijuana.
I’ve been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe that honesty is usually the best policy. Don't want to grow a wooden nose like Pinocchio
I curse.
I have changed mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I’m TOTALLY smart.
I’ve broken someone’s bones.
I’m paranoid sometimes.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe , free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I love sushi.
I talk really,really fast.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling. Yeah... I wish I had sisters and another brother.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn’t survive without Caller I.D.
I like the way i look.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I have a hidden talent. Don't you want to know...
I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar i have. That's if I'm not pan cool or PMS-ing. Haha. No I don't pan cool.
I have a lot of friends.
I'm currently single. And yes therefore available.
Ladies.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone. Yeah. Long distance calls are ex. That's what skype is for. Long story cut short.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop. For my stuff not those junk Ying Ling finds in Victoria's Secret and those prissy shops.
Enjoy window shopping.
I would rather shop than eat.
I don’t hate anyone.
I’m a pretty good dancer. To pick up girls? I'm just good at catching and a bit of something here and there.
I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.

I have a cell phone. I had to work hard for it.
I believe in God. Absolutely.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I’ve rejected someone before. Er, long stories also.
I want to have children in the future. Like duh? And please, no caesarean. And minimum 4. Haha kidding la.
I have changed a diaper before. Yeah. Many cousins. All babies.
I’ve called the cops on a friend before. -smiles-
I’m not allergic to anything. Except caffeine
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I have tried alcohol before.
I have made a move on a friend’s significant other or crush in the past.
I own the “South Park” movie.
I would die for my best friends. Really grey area... Not suicidal though.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and i like it. Some prick introduced the campfire song song.
I am happy at this moment! Nah. Exams. Sejarah.
I’m obsessed with guys.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
I am comfortable with who I am right now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever i can.
I have jumped off a bridge. Yeah which was only less than a story high into a river.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
Plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I’m proficient in a musical instrument. Piano.
I worked at McDonald’s restaurant.
I hate office jobs. Yeah my butt can't take it.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I went college out of state.
I like sausages. German frankfurters are real tasty. No wrong impressions I hope.
I love kisses. Hershey's? Haha. Avoiding...
I fall for the worst people.
I adore bright colours.
I can’t live without black eyeliner.
I somehow enjoyed this thingy
I usually like covers better than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes. You can't? Weirdo.
I can’t whistle. Never could do it.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I’ve ever written in.
I can’t stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood. My granddad plays jazz for a lounge last time.
I wear a toe ring.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical the better.
I’m an artist.
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy. Unless you're some kind of self-depressed emo goth then you don't. What? Even people have to feel. I mean even evil people like to be happy. I mean you don't want to be sad all the time...
I am an adrenaline junkie…

I tag
Wen Xian. Jun Hsien. Yi May.